I’m only a couple of years shy of 40, which means I’m due a mid-life crisis any day now. But instead of piercing my ears, splurging on a red convertible, and upgrading my phone for the pure thrill of it, I’ve decided to do something uncharacteristically sensible – create a modest list of tech that I’d like to own by the time I hit the big five-oh.
Some of it, like a humble fitness tracker, shouldn’t be too tricky. At least, I hope not. Other items have considerably more digits in their price tags, which means I’ll either need to win the lottery, or make a drastic career change to have any shot. Can you see why I’ve added an extra 12 years to my imaginary deadline?
Either way, it’s all just a bit of Friday afternoon fun. What’s on your list?
Omega Speedmaster 38mm
I cannot begin to describe just how much I’m over smartwatch notifications. And I get paid to put words together for a living! I don’t even have a smartwatch – just a Garmin – but even then, the notification fatigue is real. Yes, I mute, but every day there’s a new app that slips through the cracks. And as much as I love it for tracking all my steps and health stats, my word, do I miss the beautifully impressive, simultaneous complexity and simplicity of a traditional, mechanical watch.
With that in mind, I’m not overthinking this. And why should I? Stuff’s resident Chief Horologist Spencer Hart is a walking, talking tome of encyclopedic watch knowledge, and if he says he’d choose the black-dial version of Omega’s refreshed Speedmaster 38mm (with its tidy round subdials and five-link steel bracelet), who am I to argue with him?
According to Spencer, it borrows the familiar Moonwatch look in a smaller case, while the automatic Calibre 3332 winds itself as you move your wrist. The chronograph also gives you a separate stopwatch to fiddle with, operated by the pushers beside the crown. There’s no date window interrupting the dial on this version, either. Just a rather lovely arrangement of hands and markers, powered by tiny mechanical parts.
Garmin Cirqa
My previous choice is lovely, but it does leave the small matter of fitness tracking. Well, I say small matter – I’m actually hopelessly dependent on Garmin’s ecosystem, relying on it to track my steps, weight, activities, and sleep. It’s all part of a futile attempt to make it through at least another four decades with a relatively empty medicine cabinet and a body that can handle a trip to the shops unaided.
Enter Garmin’s screenless Cirqa fitness tracker. It can happily live on my other wrist, leaving the Omega free to get on with looking handsome. It quietly collects activity, sleep, and heart-rate data, all of which sync to Garmin’s Connect app. Better yet, I don’t need a subscription for the core tracking features, and battery life stretches to a claimed 10 days. The main thing, though, is the very intentional absence of a pesky glowing screen competing for my attention every time I glance down.
KEF LS50 Wireless II
Beyond headphones, most of my music comes from the ageing Amazon Echo Show 10 in my kitchen. It helps pass the time while I prep mirepoix. It’s fine for what it is, but I’m long, long overdue for a proper grown-up at-home listening experience. I’ve always loved the understated look of the KEF LS50 Wireless II, and the fact that they’re active speakers means I don’t need to mess around with a separate amp and extra cables.
Each speaker places its tweeter in the middle of the larger driver, helping the different frequencies reach you coherently. But you don’t even need to know that. Simply put, they sound superb, and would look great flanking the TV. That’s by design, too – AirPlay 2 and Google Cast make streaming straightforward, while HDMI eARC lets them handle TV sound without skipping a beat.
MasterClass
If MasterClass offered a course on putting things off, I’d likely be teaching it. There’s a long list of new skills I want to learn. Japanese! The guitar! Have I done anything about it? Nope. Would it help if a world-famous master of their craft offered to teach me one-on-one? Probably.
Hans Zimmer’s film-scoring course is a tempting place to start. Across 31 lessons, he explores creating themes and writing music around dialogue, with five hours and 40 minutes of teaching to work through. I’ll get to study the decisions behind his soundtracks, including how music serves the story. These are recorded lessons, rather than a personal Zoom call, so I’ll try not to be too disappointed when Hans doesn’t answer me back. At least I can pause to try out ideas without keeping an Oscar winner waiting.
Porsche Macan GTS Electric
My imaginary garage gets a Macan GTS Electric, because what’s a definitely-not-mid-life-crisis without a fast red car? Porsche quotes 0–60mph in 3.6 seconds with Launch Control, which should be quite enough to rearrange whatever I’ve carelessly left loose in the boot (or, indeed, my insides).
There’s substance beyond the straight-line shove, too. Sports air suspension sits 10mm lower, while torque vectoring helps the car turn into corners. Optional rear-wheel steering adds agility – handy when your dream car also has to negotiate an ordinary car park. It’s still a practical SUV with space for passengers, and Porsche quotes a 10–80 per cent charge in 21 minutes under optimal fast-charging conditions. I like it in red.
Playseat Trophy and Logitech G Pro
For my newfound (sim) racing ambition following a recent visit to Brands Hatch, I’ll also make room for a Playseat Formula Instinct with Logitech’s Pro Racing Wheel and Pro Racing Pedals.
The immersion and comfort of the seat has, I think, a rather obvious appeal, while the wheel’s direct-drive motor provides proper resistance through the hands, with Trueforce adding road and engine detail in supported games. The brake pedal can even measure how hard I slam it down, helping me practise applying consistent braking force as I hurtle towards a corner. And having everything mounted to a dedicated frame means that I can get properly stuck in without hunting for pedals under a desk.
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